Dating Tips on Dating and Money: Who Pays?

Dating and money: who pays? What are the expectations? Does it matter if it’s an online setup or a date with someone you’ve already met? These dating tips were discussed during a recent telegathering I hosted for long-term relationship seekers and marriage-minded people. In today’s world, online dating and societal shifts have blurred the lines of responsibility, which makes these relationships questions more difficult to answer than they once were.

Prior Planning

My first dating tip is that the cost of the date doesn’t matter as much as the effort that goes into the planning. I cannot stress this enough: Do your planning. Whether you have $10 or $100, you can make a date memorable by putting some thought into your dates. There’s an extensive list of ideas online at my website. If you live in the DC area you go to “Great Places to Take a Date” at for helpful dating tips on where to take a date.

Cost Effective Courting

In today’s economy, most of us need to be more cost effective with our choices, including our dates. If you are someone with a solid income, then consider yourself lucky. For many of us, planning is even more important in making your date know that you are interested in pursuing a possible relationship. Another great dating tip is that it doesn’t have to cost a lot to date. We have concerts, theatre in the park, botanical gardens and so many nice places you can take a date. You don’t have to spend a lot of money, especially in the early stages on courtship.

Women, if you’re on a budget, buy some groceries and cook for your guy. Time and again my male clients who pay for the majority of dates have told me how much the simple effort of a home cooked meal means to them. They also don’t want to feel like they are always giving and not getting any effort back.

If you live in DC, you can find cost friendly options at A picnic at a free concert means much more to a woman if the details are worked out beforehand (i.e., blanket, chairs, picnic basket of food, wine or drink). In today’s busy world, many women enjoy having everything planned for them in advance so they can relax during the date. I know I always appreciated this. My husband Alan did this for me on one of our first dates.

And Who Pays?

The traditional answer was that the man should always pay. Today, however, that’s not always the case…Lots depends on each ones relative incomes. However, my dating tip for you is that on the first meeting set up via an Internet dating site, you should not expect the other person to pay. So if you’re meeting for coffee, each person should expect to pay for his or her own share of the tab. Most women will appreciate it if you pick up her tab. However, this should not be expected on a meeting when you’ve never met one another prior to the date.

Another key dating tip is that if you have met your date prior to your initial date and you asked for the date, then, you should plan on paying. I heard a horror story from one of my clients who was asked out by a man to an expensive restaurant and then asked to split that big check…and her portion of the meal only cost a fraction of the man’s! Remember, the same applies to you: if you ask a man for a date, be prepared to pull out your purse. The man may insist on paying in the end – however, you should plan on paying if you do the asking.

My last dating tip for you is that if the man pays for dinner, it would be nice if the woman offered to pay for the movie or parking. Today, men are looking for partners and it shows you don’t expect to be given everything. A man will appreciate the offer even though he may insist on paying for the whole date. Again, your relative incomes do matter in dating relationships.

Until Next Time,

Amy Schoen

Amy Schoen, MBA, CPCC is a certified professional life coach and a national dating and relationship expert. Schoen, author of “Motivated to Marry: Now There’s a Better Method to Dating and Relationships” and “Get It Right This Time: How to Find and Keep Your Ideal Romantic Relationship”. Learn more about Coach Amy, her products, services and free teleclasses at

How Can Online Dating Help You Meet the Special Someone

Being a man, one would have possibly visited clubs or bars where social network is easier to setup, looking for the right partner. However, this is really a difficult task with failures, difficulties and rejections, and it is also possible that in many cases one has not found what one was searching for. A woman must have surely received numerous proposals from men who were too drunk to speak sensibly, born losers and simply men of no interest. These would have been of no use and each woman has her own preferences for the perfect man. Today, as online dating has become a ‘ticket’ to long lasting relationships and happy dates, one can opt for it and can give it a try without feeling shy or nervous.

Advantages Of Online Dating

· Online dating sites take away one’s uncomfortable feeling and awkwardness that is normally a part of face to face date with someone. It serves as a fantastic platform as when one meets the other individual in person, both would already have strong ‘chemistry’.

· Dating websites permit singles to communicate with each other in a wide variety of ways, like webcam chat, voice chat, e-mail and text chat. All these features will help singles to understand each others’ preferences and tastes easily before they even meet.

· In case if one feels the other person is not the right match, it will be lot easier to end the relation before emotional attachment is established. As a matter of fact, if the dating is face to face, one is more likely to establish a kind of emotional bonding pretty faster as compared to online dating relationships.

· Some online dating websites also come with special ‘flirting features’ for persons who are not interested in serious relationship.

· Furthermore, online dating will open a whole new window of love relationships for you. The distance is no longer a barrier and one is free to date anybody from about any region of world. One will not be restricted to select from only singles that they know, but will have a wide range of options on hands.

· There is no time constraint involved and it is one’s personal choice to find most expedient time for it. This makes ‘virtual online dating’ one of the most appealing alternatives for busy individuals who cannot take time out of their busy schedule to find partners and spend time.

More importantly, when one is dating online, one will never have to worry about ‘which dress to wear’.

Before registering with any online website, one has to take into account the budget which one can afford to invest on dating site subscriptions or memberships. There are some websites that require only one-time payments, while a few others require one to pay on monthly basis for memberships.

So, if you are facing difficult time in finding someone offline, you can consider giving free online dating sites a try. Thousands of singles, just like you, are nowadays using dating websites to find someone. You never know, one of them may prove out ‘your’ soul mate.

Until Next Time,

Meet Market Adventures Dating Expert